HOW TO PROPERLY CHOOSE A
MAID OF HONOR

The task of selecting the Maid of Honor is one of the most difficult decisions that has to be made by the bride. The complexity is due to the fact that the duties of the Maid are normally not defined and typically poorly addressed. Every bride actually has her own opinion on how a Maid of Honor should act.

The Main of Honor is commonly perceived as a ceremonial figure that walks behind the bride down the aisle before the bridesmaids but she is much more than that. The Maid of Honor is the bride's closest friend or ally in preparing for the wedding and will always be there for the nervous bride during times of need and frustration. After choosing the fiance, this is the most important choice a young bride will make.

Here are some traditional wedding etiquette guidelines that should be considered when choosing a Maid of Honor.

The Maid of Honor does not have to be a family member.

It is not a requirement to make a sister or a female cousin the Maid of Honor. A best friend who has been there through thick and could be the best choice.

Choosing more than one Maid of Honor is not illegal but brides should make sure that multiple Maids of Honor have different responsibilities in order to avoid jealousy between them.

A key consideration in choosing the Maid of Honor is the acceptance by that person of the responsibilities of the position. Those responsibilities can be quite time consuming and onerous and the bride should discuss these responsibilities with any serious candidates for the position before she makes her choice.

Here are a few of the traditional responsibilities ascribed to the Maid of Honor.

** Her most important, and often unspoken, responsibility is to provide moral support to the bride during the entire process and should be constantly at their side prior to and including the ceremony.

** She should be willing to make a speech during the reception.

** The Maid of Honor needs to attend all-wedding activities such as showers and parties for the bride.

** She will also be tasked to plan and be financially responsible for any bachelorette party.

** She should assist in organizing and sending out the invitations and makes sure the registry is properly sent.

** Etiquette also dictates that the Maid of Honor will wear the groom's ring on her finger in the absence of a ring bearer.

** She is also part of the group that will decorate the bridal car and help the bride in wearing the bridal dress.

** Overall she must act as manager of the bridesmaids to make sure they all know their responsibilities.

Once chosen, the Maid of Honor should be treated to a nice dinner or spa to make her feel she is a very important part of the wedding. The Maid of Honor could have a dress designed differently from the other bridesmaids to make her stand out in the entourage.

Following these traditional wedding etiquette guidelines in choosing a Maid of Honor will ensure that both parties understand the relationship, and while there is no way to avoid hurt feelings in some cases, the bride must choose the Maid of Honor that makes her the most comfortable.